I think was born with some biological deficiency where I simply cannot successfully use a can opener. I spent about 30 minutes trying to open a can of green beans this afternoon. I managed to get a little part of it open, so all the little grean bean juice spilled out on the counter while I was trying to get the rest open. Bleh. Then my dad came home and asked why we used beans in a can when we could have used the fresh beans. Grrrrrr Arggghhhhhh.

Wow. Maybe it’s because Spring Break is coming up soon, but these past two days have felt like a week. I’ve done so much. I don’t even recognize this new person inhabiting my body- she’s friendly, productive, and gosh darnitall, I like her. NewEmma is sooooo cool. She’s skinnier, dresses better, and actually gets stuff done. Yesterday NewEmma called up ChurchBoy and asked him to prom. No joke. NewEmma had witnesses. He said “sure” but then checked his calendar and saw that he had a basketball tournament. OldEmma would have cried upon hearing this. But no, NewEmma said “hey, cool, sure, whatever” and was all cool about it. Then NewEmma went to the store, bought a cake mix, then rented He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not for herself.

But NewEmma was even more productive today. NewEmma got a ride home with a girl who OldEmma would never have talked to freshman year. It’s always refreshing to actually get to *know* the people who you subconsciouly stereotype, and then realize that they’re someone completely different. Once NewEmma got home she immediately made her cake. Then she left and applied for a job at Pie in the Sky. Then she went to Kroger and got 10 DOLLARS taken off her total because of some crazy Kroger spring special. Boooh-ya. Then she came home, ran, watched What a Girl Wants (sooooo so cute), and frosted her cake for Bunsen Burner day tomorrow (aka an excuse to bring in food and take a break from doing the lab assignment).

I’m still not sure who this NewEmma is, but I sure hope she sticks around.

My life in numbers.

16 – my age
3 – miles I jogged today
400 – number of wallpapers now at Under My Thumb
705 – number of cloudyday.org entries
2 – number of quizzes I have tomorrow
89.64 – the amount of money I have
500.00 – the amount of money I’m striving to have
3 – number of boys I asked to prom
0 – number of boys who said yes when I asked them to prom
22 – pieces left of my life-sized Bright poster to put together
415 – the highest electronic Yahtzee score I got today
3- number of Yahtzee’s I got in that game
45 – age my father will be on Saturday
37 – age my father will look on Saturday (ahhhhhhhh… daddy’s lil’ girl)
3 – the time tomorrow at which I will be inducted into the National Honors Society

Wow, I kind of love running. I never used to. I always used to say: where are you going, and why do you have to get there so damn fast? But going running everday has completely changed my mind. It’s not so much the act or running itself that I enjoy, but more the self-confidence that it’s giving me. I’m so high on self-esteem right now, it’s crazy. I’m loosing weight because of the running, so I’m looking and feeling better. I’ve also been doing some sit-ups so I don’t jiggle so much when I walk. Tehehehe.

I used to get dressed up and stuff to go to school, and I’ve recently decided that it’s not worth my time. I’ve given up on the idea that I’ll be able to find anyone suitable to date at my high school. So now I just wear jeans, a sweatshirt, and sneakers to school everday. My “cutesy” clothes are now reserved for the weekends when I stalk Church Boy. Who is Church Boy, you may ask? Well, he holds a similar place in my life as Plaid Boy, except that he owns a few solid-color shirts and would probably take one of my cookies if I offered them. He goes to a different school, but I salivate over see him every Sunday at church. So yeah, that’s Church Boy.

Tired of sitting on my ass and watching myself blow-up, I started seriously running on Saturday. I walked\jogged\ran 2 miles on Saturday, 3 on Sunday, 1 on Monday, and 4 today. And I’ve been going to the local park to do this running, which I quite enjoy. However, my day at the park today disturbed me. I thought I had the cute high school girl who runs at the park after school market cornered. But today I saw multiple cute high school girls who run at the park. What is this? Pfffffft. Other cute high school girls trying to steal my park-running thunder. Well lil’ missys, I’m coming back tomorrow wearing my cutest running pants. You watch your back!

My mum took my sister and I shopping earlier this evening. We didn’t buy anything much of consequence, but she did buy me Can You Keep a Secret? It’s all shiny, hardcover, new, and pink. I’m very excited about reading it tomorrow during career day at school, which will be a bore. And the main character’s name is Emma! Sweet.

Today was National Goof Off Day. Very cool. I spent quite a lot of time just now at Holiday Insights browsing the obscure and bizarre holidays.

Of course, this sudden random holiday interest was prompted by my dad proclaiming that we would be participating in National Sneak a Zuchinni onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Day (August 8th).

I’m very, very excited about tomorrow- National Chip and Dip Day. Awesome. And I kind of laughed when I read that my friend Alyssa’s birthday falls on Nation Mustard Day. It’s ironic because she just happens to be a mayonnaise connoisseur.

Happy official first day of SPRING! I had the best day today. Everything today just yelled SPRING. A kite caught in a tree at the park, Oreos with blue filling, an Arrested Development marathon on FX, killing a hornet on the floor of my living room. Yep. Spring is an all-go here.

And with that I present to you my spring layout. I totally have a girlcrush on Elisha Cuthbert. And she’s Canadian, so that multiplies her coolness factor by 20. My sister Maura also has a girlcrush on her. I told her about the layout this morning on the phone, and she said she’s excited to be seeing Elisha everyday now.

I’ve been kind of half-assing it here as of late. This is probably the LiveJournal factor at work. But I’m going to get back into the swing of things and only post icons, wallpapers, and spoilery stuff there. Well, I’m off to… I dunno… do something else.

Today I bring you Emma’s random celebrity musings.

Tara Reid
I just love how the commercials for her E! True Hollywood Story say “She took Hollywood by storm and became the toast of the town.” Bahahahaha. I almost died from laughing. Maybe all of the supposed people toasting her poured their wine into her hair. That would explain it… y’know… she has terribly stringy greasy awful hair.

Billy Ray Cyrus
He must be the most successful unsuccessful country music artist… or maybe music artist out of any genre. Honestly, where else have you seen one man get so much steam out of one hit song and a mullet.

Kathy Griffin
I think she’s selling herself short. She’s atleast a C-list celebrity. I mean… she won Celebrity Mole: Hawaii and stuff. But yeah, she’s pretty annoying, so D-list it is.

Nicole Kidman\Naomi Watts
Go back to Australia. And die soon.

Jason Priestly
You used to be cute. And now you look like a fat child molester. I advise you to stay away from all cameras because you’re creeping me out.

Celebrity Word Associations (the first things that popped into my head)
Elisha Cuthbert = sex
Julia Roberts = teeth
Chris Pratt = chin
Andrew Keegan = gross
Jessica Biel = Gear Magazine
Jennifer Garner = bangs… (BAD!)
David Anders = sex
Mel Gibson = Maverick
Johnny Depp = hair
LeAnn Rimes = gap in teeth
Cameron Diaz = ditz
Colin Farrell = cigarettes & beer
Paul Walker = The Quick and the Reasonably Angry
Jared Leto = starvation
Kiefer Sutherland = *the most amazing voice*
Angelina Jolie = lips
Ethan Hawke = should have stayed with Uma
Jonathan Rhys Meyers = football
Reese Witherspoon = Harpeth Hall
Nicole Kidman = annoying
Snoop Dogg = huggy bear
Renee Zellweger = show your teeth when you smile, please
Philip Seymour Hoffman = sharding
Kirsten Dunst = small teeth, ugly
Mark Ruffalo = the pretty
Jeff Goldblum = token scientist
Craig Kilborn = funniest guy ever

Okay, I’ve bored you for long enough.

Oh, how I love The Little Mermaid. It’s my favorite movie of ALL TIME. Maura, Audra, and I watched it this weekend together. Because we’re just that girly.

Ariel had just finished singing “Part of that World.”

Me: I wish I had a cave of human stuff. Le sigh.
Maura: You do.
Me: Really?
Maur: Yeah, it’s called YOUR HOUSE.

“I wasn’t crying Brendan. I was remembering. With tears. That’s not crying.”

- from Home Movies

I’ve been pondering a new layout ALL weekend. I finally have a pretty cool idea for one, but I have yet to execute it. Yes, I am a lazy bitch.

I had a nice little movie and shopping weekend with Maura. We saw Starsky & Hutch and Mystic River, the latter of which I *tehehehehe* snuck into. There was an annoying racket in the AC system at the theater, but since Maura and I were the only ones there, I doubt they would have taken the time to fix it, so I didn’t say anything.

On our shopping outting, we had the lovely revelation that Ann Taylor is not just for 40-year-old-women. In fact, Maura spent the majority of the time in Ann Taylor drooling over this dress. I just decided that I wanted to buy the whole store. I think I’m just going to save up all my money until the summer and then have one FABULOUS shopping weekend at little Annie Taylor’s.